“I’m not interested in driving a racecar, but I would love to cruise around in a palindrome.”

“I’m on the road, Butte is 58 miles away, and I’m driving 85 mph. So I should be there in an hour. Oh, if only love were so easy to calculate.”

“I keep my love in the trunk. And I drive slowly over speed bumps, so she doesn’t bump her head around.”

“I hired a chauffeur and I became a motivational speaker, because I don’t drive—I’m driven.”

“I have a fear of palindromes. Maybe because the only person to ever beat the hell out of me was a man named Bob.”

“It’s a conflict of interest, because I’m not interested.”

“I’m a neat person (interesting), but I’m not a neat person (organized).”