“I’m not rich in paper money, I’m rich in packets of sugar. Actually, I’m richer, because at least the packets of sugar have some real value.”

“I’m rich in poverty. I got no money coming out of my ass. I’m up to my neck in broke.”

“Empty packets of hot sauce remind me of the love I used to have for her. Now all I’m left with is this yummy taco.”

“I work as a husband, but I’m also trying to get employment as a neighbor. Sugar anyone?”

“I need love. Here’s a list of other things I need: eggs, butter, flour, and sugar. I’m making a cake for the woman I love—and another one for my lover.”

“I’m a tiger made out of a paper towel, and I’m going to wipe you out.”

“It’s 3:33 am as I’m writing this down on loose sheets of printer paper. I’m in the back office sitting behind the manager’s desk, just enjoying the good life. In essence, this job enables me to be a real writer, because here I am writing, and getting paid to do it.”