“I’m twice as old as she is tall. She’s half my age in height. We have a David and Goliath kind of love.”

“I was seen spotted with an older woman and a girl half my height in age. A leopard was also spotted.
”

“Life isn’t so bad. I’m not fat (unless you’re Gandhi), I’m not short (unless you’re Goliath), and I’m not ugly (unless you’re James Dean).”

“At five in the morning, I was half asleep. The whole left side of my body was taking a nap. Seems I’m also always half in love, from my waist down.”

“Love is like learning to ride a midget, which I’ve never done because I’m afraid of heights.”

“Why did she want to see me for 15 minutes? I guess because half an hour was twice too long to say I love you. She also used 1,000 times the amount of words that were needed.”

“I’m 30-years-old, and I still can’t get out from under my father’s shadow. He’s really tall, so maybe I’ll just ask him to move over a few feet.”