“It takes maturity and practice and patience to spread chunky peanut butter evenly on crumbly bread.”

“You can spread jelly on the peanut butter but you can't spread peanut butter on the jelly.”

“To prepare any activity for the child, it is necessary for the parent to think through every detail ahead of time. For example, is the cracker stiff enough to spread the peanut butter on or does it crumble with the pressure of spreading?...All of these difficulties become apparent in the preliminary practice period by the adult prior to a presentation to the child.”

“Man can not live by bread alone ... he must have peanut butter.”

“I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.”

“I want to scrape earwax out of your ears like the last of the chunky peanut butter in a jar. I’d love it if you ate one of my world famous Listening Sandwiches.”