“I’ve been meaning to go shopping for boxing gloves, but I’ve been putting it off. I just need to knock it out and be done with it.”

“There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, 'Yes, I’ve got dreams, of course I’ve got dreams.' Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they’re still there.”

“I’ve often wondered why boxing gloves are bright red. If I were a boxer, I’d wear camouflage colored boxing gloves so my opponent would never see my punches coming.”

“I’ve been looking for a feeling like that everywhere I go. I’ve been waiting for someone to see all the good in me at every truck stop and intersection along the way. I’ve been waiting all my life for the moment to arrive when I can just stop. Stop looking”

“You’re going to be my grandmother.”“You silly child. In my heart, I’ve been your grandmother for years. I’ve just been waiting for you to make it official.”

“I just weighed myself, and I thought I weighed 165, but it turns out I weigh 180. Wow! I’ve put on muscle mass and I haven’t even been working out at all!”