“Just got done giving my cat a haircut and eating dinner. The two events are unrelated, though I might cough up a hairball later on.”

“Every time a book opens, an angel coughs up a hairball.”

“At the last minute, I couldn't wear the Hitler mustache because Tiger Stripe ate it; and then I didn't want to take my kitty and risk his coughing up some big Nazi hairball on someone's front stoop.”

“Wolves eat cats for dinner. By God, I wanna be a wolf.~Kane Tyler~”

“It's the way you look whenever she mentions her fiance. My cat looks like that before he hacks up a hairball.”

“My family suffered. My hair turned up in every corner, every drawer, every meal. Even in the rice puddings Tessie made, covering each little bowl with wax paper before putting it away in the fridge--even into these prophylactically secure desserts my hair found its way! Jet black hairs wound themselves around bars of soap. They lay pressed like flower stems between the pages of books. They turned up in eyeglass cases, birthday cards, once--I swear--inside an egg Tessie had just cracked. The next-door neighbor's cat coughed up a hairball one day and the hair was not the cat's.”