“Life’s like brown sugar sprinkled on shit. Sure it tastes great, if you don’t mind the smell.”

“Candy is full of taste. But so is shit, because taste is full of smell.”

“For breakfast I want a bowl of sugar with some corn flakes sprinkled on top. Then I want to make sweet love to you.”

“You shit sheep shapes, and I shit wolves as brown as bark. It’s all politics.”

“Try my all-you-can-eat vomit soup. Sadly, people don’t want seconds, because they don’t even want firsts. But it tastes great. I tasted it on the way down—and then again on the way up.”

“I can taste one sugar crystal, just like I can feel one Cupid (the metric unit of measurement for love).”

“I love the way the color lavender smells, and the way the color salmon tastes. And if there were a color called “fur,” I’d like the way it feels.”