“Love is tender, like the pot roast I’m keeping warm in my shoes.”

“Love is like a banana, and I keep it in my pocket on cold days to warm up my hand.”

“I like wearing earmuffs. They keep my balls warm.”

“I keep a fish in each pocket, and one in my left shoe, so I don’t drown in your love.”

“Sometimes it feels like I’m walking around with bricks for shoes, not going anywhere.”

“Love is like a blanket: it will keep you warm, but it might also suffocate you. Also, it's probably covered with cat hair—love, I mean.”

“Of all the things I own, I’m most sentimental about my shoes, because they’ve traveled with me every step of my journey.”