“Ma’am, I can take either you or your purse, but I can’t take both. And honestly, I’d rather take your purse.”

“Yes, ma’am, I will take seconds. Your dinner tastes like excrement. I scream, you scream, we all scream for excrement.”

“I can take care of myself, but I can’t take care of myself and a child. I’ve decided to give myself up for adoption.
”

“If you were to talk about your nose, I’d take everything you’d say at face value.”

“I am the kangaroo of love. Do you question it? You can take your skepticism and stuff it straight down my pouch.”

“I play the only instrument that takes in music rather than propelling it out: the ear trumpet. Don’t bother snickering at me—I am deaf to your mockery.
”

“Time flows like a canoe floats, and my love would fit in your purse if you’d just empty your money into my wallet.”