“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.
”

“I’d like to tweeze all the Tuesdays of the year, and all the Mondays off my chest.”

“Trying to learn body language in a week is like trying to master Polish in 20 hours. And come on, Polish would take at least 24 hours to conquer.”

“I make love like a half an hour minus 27 minutes. If you’re as bad in bed as I am in math, that’s roughly four minutes. And I do mean rough.”

“When anybody asks me what time it is, I always say, “Yesterday, plus 24 hours.”

“The only equality that exists on earth is time. We all have exactly 24 hours in a day. How we choose to spend those hours is what separates us.”

“A blanket could be used as Concealment Revealer. It both conceals and reveals, like great dialogue. Here’s some great dialogue I wrote for two characters, Mr. Brick, and Ms. Blanket:
Mr. Brick: I like your dress
Ms. Blanket: I’m naked, you moron
Mr. Brick: Tuesdays make me vomit. What are you doing one minute after Monday at 11:59 PM?”