“Most of the time, I feel like Phelps. At least when I’m not winning Olympic gold medals, which is an all the time thing for me.”

“I’m a four-time Pulitzer Prize winning admirer. I’m also a 16-time Olympic medalist observer (I saw Michael Phelps on TV).”

“I want to meddle with an Olympic medal made of silver metal. I want to alchemize it into gold, and use a mixture of science and mysticism to transform losing into winning.”

“Bricks, bricks, and bricks could be given away at the Olympics, instead of gold, silver, and bronze medals. If all a champion wants is to win, then I’ll take all that unnecessary gold and silver off the international community’s hands. 
”

“I think they should combine the Summer and Winter Olympics and call it the Fall Olympics. They could host it in the spring, when all the lovers will flock to see me preform live for the chance to win their affection.”

“Beer has that Olympic medal color,” Rot replied, “but does it have a winning taste? I’d hardly call silver a champion flavor. No, I’ll stick to my red wine.”

“If I ever meet Michael Phelps, I’m going to tell him that I am that Michael Phelps of random thoughts. Then I’ll challenge him to a game of pool.”