“Most people buy the highest quality television sets, only to watch the lowest quality television shows.
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“I’m a poor worker. The quality of work I do is excellent, but I make no money.”

“Love is patient and love is kind. Damn! Why’d it have to be the two qualities I wasn’t born with?”

“I am a love factory. I make love out of high quality plastics at an affordable price.”

“I won’t allow anyone to buy you a clock. Not on my watch.”

“For just over my price range, I can get something way under my quality expectation level. Thanks, inflation!”

“Here’s a list of three character qualities women should look for in a guy, in descending order: Looks like me, thinks like me, is me.”