“My close friends are fond of telling me that I put the “yalt” in loyalty. Well, I don’t know if I’d go that far with it, but yeah, I guess I am a pretty yalty person.”

“I often wonder how far I’d go for love. I guess it all depends on the price of gas.
”

“I called to tell her I loved her, which was smart, because if I’d have done it in person, I’d have caught her with another man. I don’t care if he was my clone, it isn’t right and it pisses me off. I was backstabbed by myself.
”

“Do I look like someone you know? Well you don’t know me, so why don’t you go bother my clone? And if you do see my clone, tell him I should have made an omelet out of him when I had the chance.”

“I don’t worry about identity theft, because I don’t even know who I am as a person. So if I’m not even in possession of my own identity, how can it be stolen from me?”

“I’d kill for any one of my friends. Thankfully for the overpopulated prison system, I don’t have any friends.”

“I’d rather be me being me than me trying to be my own clone. I try to stay true to who I am as a person, not a genetically modified being.”