“My eyes were blurry from being in love, and my feelings were as furry as Bigfoot. I thought I spotted Her, the women of my dreams, but the other cryptozoologists thought I was hallucinating. They chided me saying, “If there is no picture, there is no proof.”

“She didn't say it, I only thought she said it. So really it was my thought, my words, and not hers. How could I confuse "I love you" with "May I take your order?”

“Will I be subtly influenced by what my clone says, or by my own subconscious? Will my thoughts really be mine, or will they be mine—the other me?”

“We were in love. When I say we, I don’t mean her and I. I mean me and my clone were in love with her. But she didn’t even know I existed, just as I didn’t know my clone existed. I still don’t know he exists.”

“The other day I woke up to find my girlfriend already gone from the house, and a sticky note on the fridge that said, "I love you." "Oh my God," I thought. "Somebody's obsessed with me, and they kidnapped my girlfriend just to get closer to me.”

“I murdered all my staff. I’m terribly sorry. I thought they were someone else (my wife).”

“At first I thought my wife and I were made for each other. It was as if we came out of the same factory. I think we were made in the USA, because things quickly began falling apart.”