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Jarod Kintz - “My favorite pen is my penis. Put my words...”

“My favorite pen is my penis. Put my words in your mouth.”

Jarod Kintz This Book is Not for Sale

Explore This Quote Further

“My cat’s favorite chew toy is a pen. I’d wager that he is a better writer than me.”

Jarod Kintz This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

“A chef should make a dish using only my words as ingredients. My words will taste great in your mouth.”

Jarod Kintz $3.33

“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.”

Jarod Kintz This Book is Not for Sale

“There’s a penis in my penne pasta. It’s my penis, but that doesn’t mean it belongs there.”

Jarod Kintz Seriously delirious, but not at all serious

“My penis burns. I guess I should stop trying to put out forest fires with it.”

Jarod Kintz Seriously delirious, but not at all serious

“Let my hand be a blanket for my penis. ”

Jarod Kintz Brick

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