“My future, it almost looks like Christmas—red and green—stop and go.”

“The office is painted with green and red stripes. It’s not painted that way so my mom can experience Christmas 364 more days a year. It represents the stock market, with green symbolizing greed, and red representing fear. Buy when the masses are fearful, and sell when the population is greedy.”

“My sheets are so white they look like Google’s homepage. They even have a touch of red on them, from that double homicide back in December.”

“As the Hulk is green, I was bright red. I wasn’t embarrassed, but I was having a Niacin reaction.”

“A whisper is like the shadow of a shout. My shout’s a little too green if I let it grow in my neighbor’s yard.”

“Mosquito snobs sit on STOP signs trying to get out all the red.”

“I want to go to sleep in my time machine and wake up eight hours in the future.”