“My life motto: My brakes are broke, but luckily my gas pedal works just fine.
”

“I wired my gas pedal to my stereo, so now when I crank up the volume the car accelerates.”

“Somebody took my bicycle tire, my bicycle seat, and both my pedals. They stole my whole unicycle!”

“I work hard for my money. It feels very liberating to be broke.”

“The morning came pouring down on my night, but luckily I was able to convert my erection into an umbrella.”

“My motto is: If I didn’t do it first, I want to do it better. Boy, I sure hope none of my clones will have the same motto.”

“I broke down when we broke up, but I didn’t break in to her house just to break out of my routine.”