“My love is like the collision between a falling statue and still bird poop.”

“The statue stood quiet and still, like the silhouette of a tired mime.”

“My cat stood still like a furry statue. I wanted to go pet it, but I ended up petting a painting instead. Ah, but that’s life, no?”

“If love melted like a statue made of butter, would you consider me a pancake or a waffle?”

“A statue shaped like a mute. It will leave you speechless.”

“Larry Bird looks like a bird, and Johnny Vagina looks like—hey, what is that in the sky?
”

“We made love like three seasons, but I didn’t fall.”