“My nostrils smell, but not to you. Oh, they have no odor, unless you count the scent of nostalgia, which is what they always smell like.”

“I love the smell of cleanliness. That’s what the inside of my nostrils smell like, naturally.”

“If I had nostrils on my index fingers, I wonder what the inside of my nose would smell like?”

“I want to upholster the inside lining of my nostrils with leather, to have that "new car smell" all the time.”

“Sometimes I still get the urge to stuff asparagus up my nostrils, even though I don't like the way it makes my pee smell.”

“I don't like musty smells. I much prefer less definitive fragrances, like the scent of maybe.”

“My asshole smells like a bookstore. So, are you a big reader?”