“My OCD governs my actions like a governor, but I didn’t vote for it. No, I voted for Dora J. Arod.”

“This is my logo for Dora J. Arod”

“My book is awful,” I said.
“Nonsense,” Dora J. Arod said. “Your book is nonsense.”

“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other acceptable answers are Dora J. Arod and Jarod Ora.”

“I vote to have my vote voided—which means my vote won’t count even when it counts, and it will count even when it won’t count.”

“I ran over some dog poop on my drive home last night. But I didn’t feel bad, because I didn’t vote for that particular politician.”

“I like to vote, but not be voted on. I don’t mind losing one on one, but to lose through a vote means the majority think I’m a loser.”