“Not only did I lie about lying, but I lied about lying about lying. And you’d better believe that’s the truth.”

“Men lie to get laid, women lie about orgasms, and hermaphrodites lie to themselves.
”

“When the tax man cometh, lie about lying on your taxes.”

“A brick could be used to ascertain the truth. And then logically, a non-brick could be used to detect the lie. What kind of things are non-bricks? Well, anything from blankets to lies. So therefore, a lie could be used to detect a lie, and all this logic makes me want to grab a blanket and lie down—and that’s the truth. 
”

“She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her.”

“Love is the color of red inverted. At least that’s what Gunnar Greenlove told me, and I believe him because he’s from an island where half the people tell only the truth and half tell only lies. Not only that, but the island has a population of two, and I am the other inhabitant.”

“A blanket could be used to find the Brick of Truth. Many lies will be layered on the Brick of Truth to try to cover it up, but the blanket will cover up all the lies, thus covering up the cover up and thereby revealing the Brick of Truth. And don’t try to steal the covers, because the blanket will only provide warmth to the Brick of Truth. 
”