“Not only did I not join, but now I can’t quit. I’m a nonmember for life.”

“Death—I’m a nonmember for life.”

“I’m older now, which I can’t help, but I’m also fatter, thanks to all the extra helpings.”

“What I did I can’t undo. But I can address it, and undress you.” This is the chorus in a new song I’m writing called “Mannequin Love.”

“Not only did I not get it done, but I’m over budget too. I’m like a politician.”

“I can’t go out tonight, because unfortunately I’m all tied up at the moment. I’m not busy, but I am kidnapped.”

“I’m at a point in my life where I feel like I can’t go anywhere. Maybe I’ll try to coax my cat off my lap so I can get up and move.”