“Question for your life: If we were to kiss passionately for 30 minutes, would you refill my oxygen tank in the process?”

“I drove 30 miles to buy some breath mints before I realized I had some already in my pocket. Then it took me another 30 minutes to figure out they weren’t breath mints at all—they were aspirins.”

“Question for your life: If there were a fountain machine that dispensed destruction instead of soda, would you grab an extra large cup?”

“I bought an oxygen tank, because with the global population at over seven billion people and rising, what if the world were to suddenly run out of air? And while the people will be suffocating, I’ll be the only guy prepared to pillage and loot.
”

“Question for your life: If love existed an octave above where your vocal range ended, would you buy a dog whistle to get my attention?”

“Ninety minutes of pure naughty (limit 30 minutes per customer). *No clones or triplets allowed!”

“Question for your life: Let’s say we’re on a date, and I’m being all seductive by talking nonstop about such interesting topics as intergalactic nano armies and the precise elevation at which a really tall building becomes a skyscraper, how would you respond if I invited you back to my grandma’s house for a passionate night of love making?”