“Question for your life: If you could change War’s name, do you think you’d change its nature?”

“My last name should be “Why,” because it is my destiny to question everything, including how to change my last name to one of the shortest questions and the question of all questions.”

“A blanket could represent change, and a brick represents consistency. Do you embrace the blanket, or the brick?
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“If I could change any one thing about me, I’d change you.”

“You don’t offend me. At least not until I change my name. Once I change it to Asshole, then I might be offended you keep calling me Jarod.”

“Question for your life: If Ted Kennedy made it to heaven, do you think he’s pleased with the fact that Jesus can turn water into wine?”

“I’m thinking of changing my name to “Son of Manana.” Of course it isn’t accurate, because I’m the father of yesterday.”