“Some people think nature is their God. I'd like to apologize to all those people for pissing on their religion.”

“If love smelled like cheese, as some people assume it does, then I'd rather be a goat and make love all day long.”

“Love happens to some people, sometimes. Other times other stuff happens to other people. I’m a person like those people.”

“Are you OK with pissing people off to succeed? Because that’s what will happen. Success pisses off the unsuccessful.”

“Some people work to live, and other people live to work. Then some people, like me, are both unemployed and alive (at least at the time of this writing).
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“To some dogs I don’t like cats, to some cats I don’t like dogs, and to some people I don’t like. Mostly the people I don’t like are lawyers, lobbyists, and politicians.”

“Some people believe that people are essentially evil. Others believe people are essentially good. I believe they are somewhere in the middle, like Denver.”