“The only thing better than word of mouth is words of mouth. Give me at least two words.”

“Word of mouth is often louder than word of hand, although applause can be deafening. I clap like Helen Keller drank coffee—with two spoonfuls of silence.”

“Word of mouth—it's more powerful, more convincing, and more audible than word of hand. If you need me, I’ll be in the audience clapping.”

“A chef should make a dish using only my words as ingredients. My words will taste great in your mouth.”

“Mouths are longer than they are wide, to ensure words don’t come out sideways. Even the word “sideways” comes out straight.”

“My favorite pen is my penis. Put my words in your mouth.”

“Her mouth contorted, and the wrinkles around her lips were like the dunes of a frosted cupcake. And I just wanted to lick her living word machine (mouth).”