“The wind held the door open for me, and I appreciated it. Who knew the breeze was such a southern gentleman?”

“I carry a door with me wherever I go, because one, it’s symbolic for the opportunities that’ll open up for me, and two, I want to be the best door-to-door salesman who sells doors, so I carry a sample with me everywhere.”

“People talk of the “whispering wind.” But what are these secrets of the breeze? I don’t know, but I don't want a gossip to stand downwind of me.”

“Who inspires me to write? My clone. I just want him to appreciate me as a person.”

“I was hoping you’d leave the back door open for me, I said as he turned around to bend over and pick up his key.”

“If anybody can appreciate fine music, it's me. I mean who else can hit multiple octaves with their armpits?”

“A brick could be used as a doorstop. But that’s obvious. What isn’t obvious is why somebody would want to stop a door, since doors represent openness. What is that person hiding behind that door that they want to stop people from opening it up? I don’t know, but it’s got to be diabolical, and if anything is to be stopped, it’s not the door—it’s the evil plan by the Door Master to take over the world.
”