“There are 365 days in a year, and 360 degrees in a circle. Coincidence? I think not. Really, I didn’t think, and that’s why this is so dumb.”

“Love is 3:33 am plus 360 degrees plus 365 days, minus 12:34 pm. I ought to know, because I weighed it myself.”

“I didn’t do a 180-degree turn on my thinking. I simply swiveled my chair around so I could dismiss the idea from the other side.”

“I’ve come a long way in the last year. 365 days, to be exact.”

“I think a cool war helmet is painted with red and white concentric circles, exactly like a bull’s eye. But I’m not a fighter—I’m a lover. That’s why I’m joining the military. I figure after well over a decade of continuous war, all they do is fuck around.”

“The other day I tried to design a finish line, but I didn’t know where to start. So I just sat there and drank Gatorade. Ah, but that’s life, no?”

“The only time I really think is when I smoke, and I quit smoking years ago.”