“There’s nothing that says love like getting money as a gift, and then giving it away to the needy.
”

“If I were king, I wouldn’t pay you the money I owe you. I’d give you a far more valuable gift: the gift of life—your own. Yes, you’d get to keep it!”

“Love is a gift you receive by giving. The more love you give, the more love you get. Try it out today, and try it out with me. Go ahead—give me all your love.”

“I wish art was like money in that the more I made, the more interest it developed and plentiful it became. Money makes money, and if art made art, there’s no prison in this country that could hold my creations.”

“I make art like I make love—slowly, so I get the most for my money.”

“Love is a gift that costs nothing to give. Love is also the most valuable thing in the world. Think about that next time you’re tempted to call me a cheap bastard because I didn’t buy you a birthday present.”

“I’m a fan of Meatloaf. He has a voice like it’s covered in thick gravy. There’s nothing better to make love to, with the possible exception of grandma’s casserole.”