“This world is nothing more than fresh white underwear, and I’m going to leave my mark on it.”

“I hate it when I go shopping and leave my wallet at home, in my pants, along with my underwear.”

“I’m going on vacation, and I’m leaving my clone in charge. I’ll be gone, but I’ll be here.”

“What I lack in courage I more than make up for in underwear. I am possibly the bravest coward to ever go commando.”

“I would give you all my love, but I’m afraid I’d get nothing in return. And coming from you, nothing is simply much more than I want.”

“I plan on leaving my mark on this world, in ink, with a pen spill that’ll make all the oil spills combined look like literature.”

“I’m a model citizen. Mostly I model underwear.”