“War is fought over futile and feudal things. War is not about ideology, no matter how artfully framed, but it’s simply about power and money and control.”

“It’s hard to hear over the racket of gunfire. Politicians want to talk about war, but the people want to talk about peace.”

“Make pizza, not war. No matter how you slice it, that’s wise.”

“If pens doubled as bullets, I bet few writers would want to write about war.”

“A pear, an apple, and a banana in a basket on a table isn’t art, no matter how skillfully painted. But it is something to talk about, or at least a tasty way to utilize one’s mouth.”

“You can believe history books when they tell you when wars were fought. You just can’t trust them as to why.”

“I wish somebody would have told my grandpa about the Cold War, so he could have at least put on a jacket.”