“When I have children I want an even number of boys and girls, and that’s why I want 15 kids—7 boys, 7 girls, and one hermaphrodite named Sam.”

“Because I want to go to the dance," I said."But why can't you go as a boy? Won't it be risky going as a girl?"Of course it would be risky. But everything I'd done for the past four months had been risky.I took a deep breath before speaking. "I want to go as a girl, because I want to dance with a particular boy."Mrs. Smithers rolled her eyes at this. "There's always a boy, isn't there?”

“Please. She sighed. 'Can't a girl have high standards? I don't want an ordinary boy.”

“I'm fairly fond of boys, but my preference is for girls; When I have enough of a girl, she serves me still as a boy.”

“REJECTION MINIMIZATION THEOREM (RMT): Think about it: boys basically, want to kiss girls. Guys want to make out. Always. Hassan aside, there's a rarely a time when a boy is thinking, "Eh, I think I'd rather not kiss a girl today.”

“Why do all the hot girls want the jocks and the good boys? We losers are the ones that need you.”