“When someone insults me, I simply shut down. Then I open back up at 9 am the next morning.”

“Last night I placed a handwritten note on the front door of my neighbor’s house that said, “Sorry, we’re closed. Come back tomorrow after 9 am.” I wouldn’t have done it had I known he’d knock on my door and ask to spend the night because he thought I was open.
”

“In my view, a Cyclops is halfway to being blind. Love sees all. When someone insults me and I go silent, I’m in Helen Keller mode. Listen!”

“When someone I admire turns out to be a rather normal guy, I get offended because it’s an insult to my jealousy.”

“I am quite possibly the world's bravest coward. I have never backed down from backing down from a fight.”

“When tragedy befalls me and someone says, "Better you than me," I always reply, "Yes, I am better than you.”

“I was hoping you’d leave the back door open for me, I said as he turned around to bend over and pick up his key.”