“Writer’s want to write something that’ll live forever. I don’t. What do I care if my writing lives forever if I won’t? I just want to be recognized while I’m still alive. 
”

“Writing is hard, but I don’t want to kill myself trying to write. Not unless I’m writing a suicide note.”

“I want to live for a very, very long time, but it’s important that I take care of my body. When I am 851 years old, I don’t want to look it. No, I want to look 158.”

“I don’t like writers whose writing is so obvious that I can predict what he’ll write while I’m still taking in his current thoughts. Why, this means that I know what he knows, and the point of reading is to discover things and thoughts which I don’t already know or that haven’t occurred to me. The greatest amusement is surprise. Fellatio! (Bet you didn’t see that coming!)”

“I want to do something for a living that when it comes time to retire and I can stop doing it, I’ll want to continue doing it in my free time.”

“I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral.”

“Writer’s block, I just drove around it four times. All my favorite writers live there.”