“You can smuggle anything into an event inside empty pizza boxes. Carrying pizza boxes transforms anyone into Moses. There can be a crowd of 20,000 people, and if you have a few pizza boxes, the crowd parts like the red sea. Hey, that guy’s got pizza. Let him pass. Make way for importance!”

“Make pizza, not war. No matter how you slice it, that’s wise.”

“I like cardboard. Of course, I have to be in the mood to eat Pizza Hut.”

“If love tasted like pork, and you were allergic to Francis Bacon, could I be your Shakespeare? We could make love on a pizza and make much ado about nothing, everything, anything, something.”

“I'm allergic to fingers, so I have to eat pizza with my feet. You should see me eat on the run.”

“Pizza is circular. So is an hour. I’ll take two slices—to go.”

“For your birthday, I got you a box. Hooray! It’s empty, so you can fill it with whatever you want.”