“You can’t believe every word you read while watching TV. (Even with closed captioning turned off).”

“How can you pull down strongholds of Satan if you don't even have the strength to turn off your TV?”

“If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed!”

“Okay, it's like this. You wake up, you watch TV, and you get in the car and you listen to the radio. You go to your little job or your little school, but you're not going to hear about that on the 6:00 news, since guess what. Nothing is really happening. You read the paper, or if you're into that sort of thing you read a book, which is just the same as watching only even more boring. You watch TV all night, or maybe you go out so you can watch a movie, and maybe you'll get a phone call so you can tell your friends what you've been watching. And you know, it's got so bad that I've started to notice, the people on TV? Inside the TV? Half the time they're watching TV. Or if you've got some romance in a movie? What to they do but go to a movie? All those people, Marlin," he invited the interviewer in with a nod. "What are they watching?"After an awkward silence, Marlin filled in, "You tell us, Kevin.""People like me.”

“Hey, Geekoid!" yelled Duncan Dougal, "Why do you read so much? Don't you know how to watch TV?”

“I think a funny picture would have a caption that read, “Believe in yourself,” with an accompanying image of a wilting flower.”