“You may not have said anything, but you’re right—silence is the best response.”

“If you can be quiet, you’re more than welcome to stay in my House of Silence. Bring your own bubblegum ice cream. 
”

“People always ask me if I’m into sports, and I say, “Well, isn’t writing a sport? If you’re doing it right, and you have a deadline, you should be sweating.”

“If you’re hungry, eat one of my new starvation pills. They taste like silence.
”

“Sometimes I ask myself, "Do I have the courage to do the right thing when it matters most?" And that answer, I'm afraid, is silence.”

“The best part about vomiting is that right after you do, you can continue eating.”

“I think the best time to stare off into space is when you’re going 65 on a motorcycle, provided you’re wearing your astronaut’s helmet.”