“It's Coke, my man. You really think I'm going to let you pour any more alcohol into your body tonight?”

“Music lets you write your own checks. Don't ever forget that.”

“Here's how I'll tell you what I think—if you see white smoke then you know I picked a new pope. And if I'm drinking a Snapple then you know I don't give a shit.”

“Henry,that's how you get rid of fleas. You keep them from laying eggs. You go to war with them.”

“I'm sure you have drawers overflowing with panties the ladies throw at the stage. We saw you guys play down at Mon Brewing a few times. Way to keep the Nineties alive.”

“You are not a handgun. More like a pellet gun. Maybe even a slingshot.”

“We're all Hitler inside. We're all Christ inside. I'm not keen on the idea, but it's true, isn't it? We've all got a little bit of the devil in us.”