“I could picture life—school and everything else—continuing on without me. But I could not picture my funeral. Not at all. Mostly because I couldn’t imagine who would attend or what they would say.”

“How could I sleep with a man I wasn't sure would attend my funeral?”

“Everything around me is evaporating. My whole life, my memories, my imagination and its contents, my personality - it's all evaporating. I continuously feel that I was someone else, that I felt something else, that I thought something else. What I'm attending here is a show with another set. And the show I'm attending is myself.”

“I still loved Marc desperately and couldn’t imagine life without him. Jace was…something else. Something I could feel but couldn’t articulate. Something I wanted, and hadn’t been able to resist in my grief-weakened state. He was something that would have to wait.”

“Where would I go, if I could go, who would I be, if I could be, what would I say, if I had a voice, who says this, saying it's me?”

“Did they make Adam's apple porn? Was that a thing? Would I be scarred for life if I Googled it? And if I couldnt find any pictures, could I take my own?”