“Following Jesse's wonderful advice I will have to change my quote to:If have a sense of humour, you'll love my books; if you don't have a sense of humour, please read my books nonetheless--no matter what you have please just read my books.”

“Congrats, bro. You've just sold your soul to the devil. Wait. You don't have a soul.”

“Great way to impress your future brother-in-law, by the way," Kieran continued. "You look like you took a blood bath. The only thing missing is the axe. Would Dallas really let his little sister date a crazed murderer who hacks bodies in the basement? You need to change that shirt pronto. And oh, you're welcome. I just saved you from making a complete and utter fool of yourself, but don't mention it."I curled my lips into a fake smile. "Thanks. It's so nice to know you've got my back."Kieran regarded me coolly. "A hobby might help ease all that hunger. Have you ever considered fixing cars, or woodworking, or maybe a DIY project around the house?""You're getting a big laugh out of this, aren't you?"Kieran shrugged. "There's nothing on TV.”

“You freaking bit me," I said, my voice hoarse. "You're lucky I don't call animal control.”

“I rolled my eyes. I had just added jewel thief to my resume and almost got killed by some thug, and all my brother could think of was fancy umbrellas and tropical drinks on a beach.”

“I can still feel my legs, thanks for asking. My back’s not even hurt that badly. Only as though I was just hit by a train.”

“You're not going anywhere. If I need to put you in chains to keep you by my side, then so be it.”