“One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear.”

“Ann Coulter is living proof that you can’t make a silk purse out of a horse’s ass”

“Sarah Palin is living proof that you can't make a silk purse out of a horse's ass.”

“Some words may make you happy, some may make you said. Maybe some will make you angry. What I hope. . . what I hope is that something will whisper in your ear.”

“If you have regard to your future happiness, any view of living comfortably with a husband, any hope of preserving your fortunes or restoring them after any disaster, never, ladies, marry a fool. Any husband rather than a fool. With some other husband you may be unhappy, but with a fool you will be miserable.”

“Let it be considered that what is more wholesome than any particular belief is integrity of belief; and that to avoid looking into the support of any belief from a fear that it may turn out rotten is quite as immoral as it is disadvantageous.”