“God is like junior high, Brandon. Graduate already.”
“But that doesn't stop me from moving about him like a junior high girl lingering by the lifeguard station”
“I failed angst in high school. They let me graduate anyway.”
“Maybe the way he tried to corral me my entire junior year of high school like I was some wayward cow and he was the ranch’s most enthusiastic farmhand?”
“There had to be a circle of Hell where you were eternally fourteen, eternally in junior high. One of the lower circles.”
“George Bush junior doesnt have to sweat over getting into heaven, his daddy already bought the place.”