“Put all your eggs in one basket... the handle's going to break. Then all you've got is scrambled eggs.”

“You've got no sense of humor.""I'm going to laugh really hard after I kick your ass.”

“I can handle it. But it stinks, if you ask me, really stinks, that you get to go out somewhere drinking beer while I'm stuck at Baby Central. Just because you have a penis.""We'll think fondly of you over beer, me and my penis."She ate a little more, then smiled slowly. "You've still got to be in the birthing room when she pushes it out.""Shut up, Eve.""Your penis won't save you then, Pal.”

“Nothing ever seems too bad, too hard or too sad when you've got a Christmas tree in the living room. All those presents under it, all that anticipation. Just a way of saying there's always light and hope in the world.”

“Eve-"In the name of all that is holy...It's 2060, not 1760. Can't they figure out a better way to handle this process?"Roarke-"Amen”

“Eve: What is it about asking you Catholic questions that gets you all jumpy?Roarke: You'd be jumpy, too, if I asked you things that make you feel the hot breath of hell at your back.Eve: You're not going to hell.Roarke: Oh, and have you got some inside intel on that?Eve: You married a cop...you married me. I'm your goddamn salvation.”

“You just pounded yourself into me with all the finesse of a sweaty celibate breaking fast with a rented sex droid.”