“the real menace in dealing with a 5-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a 5-year-old.”

“Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house. ”

“If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation. ”

“I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?”

“Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze? ”

“Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.”

“The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.”