“He says: ‘it doesn’t matter. What I know is that I could do this with you’ — he makes a movement with his hands like a baker, kneading a loaf of bread — ‘and afterwards you’d be different.”

“Because bread was so important, the laws governing its purity were strict and the punishment severe. A baker who cheated his customers could be fined £10 per loaf sold, or made to do a month's hard labor in prison. For a time, transportation to Australia was seriously considered for malfeasant bakers. This was a matter of real concern for bakers because every loaf of bread loses weight in baking through evaporation, so it is easy to blunder accidentally. For that reason, bakers sometimes provided a little extra- the famous baker's dozen.”

“It doesn’t hurt much. I don’t know how it looks” – he lowered his hand and turned his face to the side – “but it can’t be that bad. What do you think? You’d date me, right?”Alex pushed him away, grinning. “You’re an idiot.”

“Adrian had a Guinness because I guess he felt like drinking a loaf of bread or something. That's what it smelled like, anyway.”

“I know you didn’t. And I know it doesn’t matter what I say now, because I fucked things up…just like I always do.”

“He’s not a food fascist,” I say, feeling an immediate need to defend Eric. “He just…cares about nutrition.” “He’s Hitler. If he could round up every loaf of bread and put it in a camp, he would.”