“I am offering you a real commitment— a place in my life forever. Even if our relationship ended, our tie to each other never would. Let me make you a vampire, Leila, and watch decades slide by like days while you’re by my side.”

“Don’t you see? It’s just not possible for one person to watch over another person forever and ever. I mean, suppose we got married. You’d have to work during the day. Who’s going to watch over me while you’re away? Or if you go on a business trip, who’s going to watch over me then? Can I be glued to you every minute of our lives? What kind of equality would there be in that? What kind of relationship would that be? Sooner or later you’d get sick of me. You’d wonder what you were doing with your life, why you were spending all your time babysitting this woman. I couldn’t stand that. It wouldn’t solve any of my problems.”

“Comfort me from wherever you are–alone, we are quickly worn out; if I place my head on the road, let it seem softened by you. Could it be that even from afar we offer each other a gentle breath?”

“Men see objects, women see the relationship between objects. Whether the objects need each other, love each other, match each other. It is an extra dimension of feeling we men are without and one that makes war abhorrent to all real women - and abusrd. I will tell you what war is. War is a psychosis caused by an inability to see relationships. Our relationship with our fellow-men. Our relationship with our economic and historical situation. And above all our relationship to nothingness. To death.”

“Siva,” I said and my heart broke for this beautiful man. “You once told me that love is hard, painful, and anything but pleasant.” I laughed, “I feel that with you, Siva. I love you so much it hurts. I didn’t have that with Dev. I loved him, of course, but now… When I look back on our relationship I realize that we were more like best friends. He didn’t make my heart speed up like this,” I said and placed Siva’s hand over my heart. “He didn’t make my toes curl with a look, he didn’t make me love him and hate him at the same time, and he didn’t leave me breathless. I love you. I’m in love with you. You’re the one I want. You’re the one I choose. You are not second best, Siva, do you hear me? You’re not. Even if… even if Dev hadn’t died I still think we would’ve found each other. You’re my heart and my soul Siva. I fell for you Siva and I fell hard and I’m okay if I never get up.”

“From this experience, I understood the danger of focusing only on what isn't there. What if I came to the end of my life and realized that I'd spent every day watching for a man who would never come to me? What an unbearable sorrow it would be, to realize I'd never really tasted the things I'd eaten, or seen the places I'd been, because I'd thought of nothing but the Chairman even while my life was drifting away from me. And yet if I drew my thoughts back from him, what life would I have? I would be like a dancer who had practiced since childhood for a performance she would never give.”