“Monkeys can't talk, stupid!”

“You can't expect everyone to have the same dedication as you.”

“Chirag: Rowley, do you think I exist?Rowley: Nope! I can't even hear you or see you!”

“I've seen a lot of movies where a kid my age finds out he's got magical powers and then gets invited to go away to some special school. Well, if I've got an invitation coming, now would be the perfect time to get it”

“I'm basically one of the best people I know.”

“Loded Diaper”

“I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley,”