“Sorry, Will, bad habit of mine. You have to stress hot in the city these days. Some places have absolutely no idea how to make a decent long black.' And there she was being all uppity slutty again.”

“I asked the Zebra, are you black with white stripes? Or white with black stripes? And the zebra asked me, Are you good with bad habits?Or are you bad with good habits?Are you noisy with quiet times? Or are you quiet with noisy times? Are you happy with some sad days? Or are you sad with some happy days? Are you neat with some sloppy ways? Or are you sloppy with some neat ways? And on and on and on and on and on and on he went.I’ll never ask a zebra about stripes...again.”

“Suzanne was kind of slutty, and it was good for every hot woman to have a slutty best friend because being able to judge your friends is one of the greatest gifts of friendship.”

“She seems to think being cryptic is some kind of substitute for having a decent personality.”

“Something snapped inside her. “Of course I’m afraid! Relationships do bad things to me.” He started to respond, but the pain had gone on long enough, and she didn’t want to hear it. “You know what I want? I want peace. I want a good job and a decent place to live. I want to read books and listen to music and have time to make some female friendships that are going to last. When I wake up in the morning, I want to know that I have a decent shot at being happy. And here’s what’s really sad. Until I met you, I was almost there.”

“I mean, like I needed the stress of a fight with slutty Ms. Thinking-She's-All-That added on top of a life/species/school change?”