“And" – his voice was soft now – "you’re a beautiful girl. If you show the slightest interest in Alec, he’ll want to go out with you. I know I would."My skin prickled with goose bumps, a chill in the hot April evening. My brain knew Grayson didn’t have the crush on me that I’d imagined when he got mad at me at the airport that afternoon. He wouldn’t have asked me to date his brother if he’d been interested in me. But my body didn’t know this, or didn’t care.”

“You drugged me,”“I didn’t want you to feel it, Merit.” His voice was soft. “You’d been attacked; you hadn’t consented. I didn’t want you to have to go through it. I didn’t want you to have to remember it.”

“I excused myself from the conversation, walked away, and stuck my hands in my jacket pockets. I had no drink. I didn’t fidget. I kept my head down and headed for the door. It wasn’t that far. I just had to get by some people who wouldn’t suspect a thing, because I didn’t know any of them. I didn’t have to grab my coat because it was still on my shoulders. If Shawn saw me, I would say I was just going for air or a smoke or something. I had been trying to quit, and he knew this, so maybe going out for air was a better excuse. Sure, it was probably eleven below, but it was crowded and he’d buy it because I’d made him believe that I’m shy. I could be out in the midnight winter chill and home within an hour. It would have been safe, and I would have been warm, and no Chinook would have hit me.”

“I’d accepted my judgment without question. Agreed to live a mortal life. I didn’t know my memories would come with me; didn’t know I’d relive them every day.Death would have been more merciful.”

“I didn’t mean it, Pidge. If he hurts you—if he even makes you feel uncomfortable—you let me know.”The anger subsided, and my shoulders fell. “I know you didn’t. But you have got to curb this over-protective big brother-thing you’ve got going on.”Travis laughed once. “I’m not playing the big brother, Travis laughed once. “I’m not playing the big brother, Pigeon. Not even close.”

“In the dark, my master let down his guard and he was Caleb again. He didn’t correct me. He didn’t punish me. He didn’t push me away emotionally. Caleb was there to hold me until the nightmares passed. He was there to tell me I was beautiful. He was there to tell me I was going to be okay. In the dark, he seduced me. I didn’t want the seduction to end.”