“But you know what? They all grinned at me in welcome,and Josh even scooted over to make room for me on the bench. At least I knew who my true friends were. Feeling grateful and loved,I sat downTHPPPPTHPPPPTHPPPPT! I farted. Or so it seemed. The boys died laughing.I pulled the whoopee cushion out from under me and flung it on the table,which only sent them into another paroxysm."Nick-Kriger-is-behind-you," Josh gasped between giggles. "He totally heard it over Galaga.Do you still want us to look without looking like we're looking?" This sent them into yet another laughing fit."But don't worry," one of his friends said. "We'll act like we think you're hot."They all snorted and dabbed at their eyes faux-girlishly with paper napkins from the holder. Then,as if on cue, they started their rythmic heavy breathing,and I knew one of Josh's raps was coming. The people in the booths around us turned to look, if they weren't already staring at us outright because of the whoopee cushion.”

“The latter is very prepubescent.""Prepubescent!" Josh gasped. "Prepubescent!""I am totally pubescent," one of his friends said.Another said haughtily, "I will have you know that my mom and I are going to Aspen to shop for training bras this weekend."I rolled my eyes. "Later." I slid off the bench and stood."Hey,we're helping you go off the jump again tomorrow,right?" Josh asked, using the word helping very loosely."Yeah," another boy said, "eleventh time's the charm."I looked toward the Galaga machine. Fiona was still there, yet Nick was gone. Probably just to order her a drink.Ordinarily, I would have bounced all over the restaurant searching for him so I could flirt him out of Fiona's pink-nailed grasp. But the whoopee cushion had taken the wind out of my sails.”

“Josh, you saw him," Tally says, "What did he look like? Did he look nice?""He looked like a person," Josh grunts."Don't be a spoilsport," Tally says, and Caid hears her smack Josh on the arm."Shortish, blondish, thinish," Josh says."Thank you, Josh," Caid says, "Your way with words astounds me yet again.""Well, whatever," Tally says. "What did you guys talk about? You said he's nice?""We talked about a lot of things. And yeah, he's—I mean, we traded numbers, so hopefully he'll call.""I hope so, too," Tally says. "I'm glad you have somebody to hang out with now.""Because I was such horrible company?" Josh says, voice thick and deep like he's got a mouthful of ice cream."I wouldn't say horrible," Caid says. "Unbearable, maybe. Like one of those YouTube videos that never loads." And with that, he shoots a shit-eating grin in Josh's direction, and shovels a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth.”

“She's in the Catskill," Shopie began, but Scathach reached over and pinched her hand. "Ouch!"I just wanted to distract you," Scathach explained. "Don't even think about Black Annis. There are some names that should never be spoken aloud."That like saying don't think of elephants, Josh said, "and then all you can think about is elephants."Then let me give you something else to think about," Scathach said softly. "There are two police officers in the window staring at us. Don't look," she added urgently.Too late. Josh turned to look and whatever crossed his face--shock, horror, guilt or fear--bought both officers racing into the cafe, one pulling his automatic from its holster, the other speaking urgently into his radio as he drew his baton.”

“The way he looked at me? Sam, you need to understand. Josh and I are friends. That’s it. He might have feelings for me – though I don’t think he does – but I do and always will, view him as a friend.” She put one small finger under his chin and lifted his face up to hers. “Besides, there’s room for only one man in my heart.”

“Toby smiled and started to speak, but Josh adjusted his hold on Tank and reached back, covering Toby's mouth."Wait," Grace said. "I think he was going to actually use words.""Yeah, but trust me, you don't want to hear them."Toby pulled Josh's hand away. "Are you my new mommy?"Grace's mouth fell open in shock, and Toby giggled at the sight."Okay, Tiger," Josh said. "You know I love the sound of your laugh, probably more than any sound in the world, but I will squash you like a grape if you say that to one more woman today.”